The reluctance in us

   What does the term reluctant mean to you? We know the definition of reluctant is “unwilling or disinclined”. Your personal definition might be very different. I feel like the word reluctant, means to hesitate. The word has its own identity to everyone. Most often the word has a negative connotation. Were you reluctant to read this article? I bet you were.

   What are your reasons for being unwilling or disinclined to eat healthier or to work out? I have asked myself this question over and over  again. For most of my life I have been reluctant to anything healthy, and I don’t know why. Sometime in my past I must have failed at something and it caused me so much grief that caused me to become the person I have become physically.

   Maybe I have a chemical imbalance, I know several people that have an imbalance and it can cause a plethora of emotional issues. I grew into the body of a man from that of a boy rather quickly, and everyone in my life found a way to let me know…”fat ass” or “tubby”, “fatso” and “porky” were just a few of the creative ways that some real jerks treated me (I have forgiven them all by the way). I guess the constant abuse from my fellow JR HIGH students made me just stop caring…I was just born lazy, probably.

   The fact is folks, none of these things are true. I started very young to like food, I learned things about myself as I got older that I kept hidden from the world, as most of us do, and had trouble making friends as a kid, was picked on by older kids, as most of us were, and felt awkward in my own skin, as most of us will at some point. The difference between me and most other kids was, I never grew out of any of it. The combination of all of those issues that never went away caused me to turn to the only thing I could find to take solace in, food. Food would always be there for me, it would never tell any of my secrets, it would never turn its back on me, it triggered many feelings inside me, and it kind of made me high. I began to realize that I was gaining weight quickly. In my mind I was already fat, so why fight it.

   By the time I was a teenager I was a giant and turning to other things for the solace that food used to give me, I wasn’t as happy with food, it wasn’t enough to sustain me. I turned to drugs, I turned to loud music, and I turned to fast driving and lying to my parents and sleeping a lot. I was so lost in this cycle that I didn’t believe it would ever end. I also looked desperately for someone to blame.

   I was always reluctant to make any changes to my health because I didn’t believe it would ever work. I never ever thought it would make a difference. I did try taking pills to lose weight on two different occasions in my life. The side effects of these pills are still haunting me today and I gained the weight back quickly.

    We hesitate out of fear, we hesitate because we don’t believe, and we hesitate because we are already in despair. We are unwilling mostly because we are hard headed, but that’s for a different blog.

    Whatever  is causing you to hesitate is holding you back. Whether it’s going in the deep end of the pool, or asking for a little help from above, reluctance will not get you where you need to be physically, emotionally or spiritually.

   Let’s try to be more willing to do things to better our lives every time we think about it. Choose real butter instead of the partially Hydrogenated crap next time. Buy a new type of fruit. Wear a shirt that fits instead of an over sized one. Smile when someone insults you and be the bigger (hearted) person. Try saying no to dessert twice this week. Don’t add cheese to your salad, Pray tonight before you sleep,  forgive someone that has hurt you…There are literally thousands of choices we make each day that we can adjust to our new anti-reluctance philosophy. This wonderful new attitude can influence the rest of your life. It can also influence the people in your life. Remember when I said your smile is your first step to your next smile…let your smile be your choice, and choose the all around healthy choice!!

Finally, if all ask fails you in your new attitude toward unwillingness and disinclination, ask someone for help, you have family or friends and if you don't, quite frankly, you obviously have the internet and if your reading this....YOU HAVE ME!!!!!! reach out!

I love you all and can’t wait to blog again tomorrow!!! (I wasn’t even the slightest bit reluctant to type that last part either)!